


Just another Gotham Saturday

by SharpestRose



Category: Batman (Comics)
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-29
Updated: 2011-06-29
Packaged: 2017-10-20 20:22:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/216757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SharpestRose/pseuds/SharpestRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everybody loves Robin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just another Gotham Saturday

**7:04 am**

When she wakes up, the first thing Steph feels is comfortable.

The second is a breast under her cheek.

She keeps her eyes shut, and groans.

"You have some of those cyanide suicide capsules, right?"

Cass stirs and stretches a little, causing Steph's pillow to shift warmly against her face. "No. Juice?"

Steph sighs. "It'll do."

-

 **8:38 am**

Batman gives Steph two little pouches to clip onto her belt. They feel like they're made of metal.

"Take one to Tim. It's a standard precaution when Ivy pulls a stunt like this."

Steph opens one of the pouches. "Woo. Is this Kryptonite?"

"Yes."

"It's not going to make me grow a third eye, is it?"

"Keep it in the pouch until it's needed. You'll be fine."

"Me?" Cass asks. Batman shakes his head.

"Not necessary. Only Robins and former Robins need worry about it."

Cass nods. Batman looks at her for a beat, as if trying to work something out. Then he turns to Steph.

"You promised me you'd do you utmost to avoid going near anyone else until it wore off."

"I... er... I tried, I swear. It was just... she found me before I could get home, and..."

Alfred clears his throat and approaches, placing a large pot of flowers on the table nearby. "Delivery for you, sir."

Steph picks up the notecard tucked between the blooms. "Ooo. Who's Selina?"

Batman plucks the card from between her fingers. "Never you mind, Robin."

-

 **9:17 am**

"Is Tim home?"

"You're up and about awfully early for a Saturday, Stephanie," Tim's Dad says, squinting against the morning's bright light. She smiles and flicks her hair back over one shoulder.

"I do running. Early starts, you know."

"Come -" he yawns widely and covers his mouth with one hand. "In."

Tim's at the dining table, reading the newspaper and eating an apple.

"You've got a visitor," Tim's Dad says, stumbling over to the coffee maker.

"Hi, Steph."

"Can we go upstairs?"

"Sure." Tim stands up. "Come on."

When they're in Tim's room, Steph pulls the second pouch out of her shoulder bag and hands it to Tim. "I was told to give you this. It's -"

Tim looks at the pouch and sighs. "Did she get the vegetables this time?"

"What?"

"Are the city's vegetables laced with potent aphrodisiacs again?"

"Flowers. Big pollen-spurting flowers. Are you telling me Ivy's created _sex carrots_ in the past?"

"Turnips." Tim slips the pouch into his pocket. "Was anyone hurt?"

"Nope. Not yet, anyway. We still have to catch her. She got me and Batman last night when we were on patrol." Steph keeps her voice at a whisper, glancing at the closed door behind her. After the morning she's had, she doesn't want to have to deal with Tim's parents.

Tim looks horrified. "You... you and... you didn't."

"No." Steph shakes her head. Tim breathes out a sigh of relief. "No, we only got the edge of a spray. He ordered me to go home and stay on my own until it passed. And, seriously, if I'm never again in a position where Batman asks me if I have a vibrator, that's fine with me. I bet if I'd said no, he'd have pulled some special massaging thing out of the trunk of the car and told me to take it with me. It'd have a little bat logo on it."

Tim's fighting valiantly against a laugh. Steph can tell from the way his face is twitching.

"But... uh..." Steph looks at the ground. He deserves to know. "I kinda... slept with Batgirl."

-

 **9: 43 am**

"I just can't believe you didn't come to _me_. I'm your boyfriend!"

"I told you, I didn't go to her. She found me."

"I'm... I can't believe you slept with Batgirl."

"Would you stop saying that?"

"What? You said it first. You slept with Batgirl."

-

 **9: 44 am**

"I slept with Robin," Cass says.

Babs looks away from the computer screen. "I forgot to mention that part of the legacy, didn't I?"

-

 **9: 45 am**

"Look, you want the real answer? Out of my two best friends - my two best _virgin_ friends - Cass was the one who hasn't had her whole world turned upside down in the last few months, okay? The last thing I wanted to do was mess with your head."

"So cheating on me with Cassandra was you being _nice_ to my sanity?"

"Hey, don't you go waving the cheater-stick at me, Mister! I saw you with that Tim Burton reject at your school!"

"Darla?"

"Is that her name? I kinda thought 'skanky little slutmuffin' suited her."

"Reality check, Steph. You're the one who, when stoned on supervillain sex pollen, threw herself at someone decidedly not her boyfriend of two years."

"Oh, like you're _upset_. I've never met anyone as happy with virginity as you, Timothy Drake!"

"Will you keep it down? Dad and Dana will hear!"

"So they don't know you're a teenage boy, either?"

Tim pinches the bridge of his nose. "Let's go out to the park or something."

"Fine with me."

-

 **10:00 am**

"I'm not really angry that you slept with her. I'm just surprised," Tim says as they walk around the edge of the park's greasy-looking pond.

"You do a pretty pissed version of not being angry, then," Steph retorts.

"It's not that." Tim looks at her. His expression is sad and tired. "Until this happened, I'd been doing a pretty good job of not thinking about the fact that you're Robin now. But... you are."

"Yeah." Steph can't help but smile a little. "I am." She breathes in a deep sigh. "This is what it means to be a Bat, huh?"

"Pretty much. Crushing on your team-mates is a big part of it. Have you had a fight with Batman yet?"

"Not yet."

"He'll probably fire you sooner or later. Or you'll quit and come back a bunch of times."

"You know, you all looked way more glamorous from the outside." Steph's smile turns rueful.

"I know." Tim nods. "You show up in the suit and you think you know what you're in for, and the next thing you know you're carrying Kryptonite and fighting crazed naked people high on turnips."

"What's with the Kryptonite, anyway?"

"Ivy enjoys getting a number of powerful beings involved in this sort of thing."

"You mean Superman's going to show up and try to fight me?" Steph yelps, hand going to the pouch at her hip.

Tim presses his lips together. "He probably won't want to _fight_ you..."

Her laugh comes out a splutter. "You're kidding. This is the Tim version of what a joke sounds like."

"My jokes rarely involve aliens who have a keen fascination with Batman's sidekicks."

"Okay, that's it, I quit."

"Told you so."

Steph's quiet for a few moments. " _Superman_ ," she mutters. Then her eyes narrow, and her mouth widens into a grin. "Who'd you crush on?"

"What?"

"You said you crushed on someone. Who?"

"Let's just say that Superman's not unique in his proclivities."

"Okay, now let's have that answer in English, Tim."

Tim clear his throat. "Robin. It was Robin."

"Hm." Steph blinks. "Guess that makes roleplaying pretty easy."

-

 **12:23 pm**

They go to a cafe for lunch. Tim doesn't tell her she's gross when she puts salt on her pancake.

"How are you?"

He shrugs. "Ask me again in another three months."

"Okay. I'm sorry. That it's weird for you. The whole thing with me taking over your job."

"Someone had to. I'm glad it's you."

"Liar."

"Another skill you'll learn in time."

-

 **1:45 pm**

They stop a mugging, almost by accident.

Tim seems to feel guilty about it.

"I'm pretty sure your Dad doesn't mean you have to be a totally heartless bastard. He just doesn't want you seeking that sorta thing out."

"I know. But I jumped between an old lady and a gun. I'm pretty sure that's a no-no."

"I've never seen you freak out so much over the thought of keeping a tiny secret. It's not even a white lie, it's so innocent."

"Maybe I'm tired of secrets." He says it like it's something he's thought about a lot. Then again, this is Tim. He thinks about pretty much everything a lot.

"It's okay, Tim," Steph tells him. She makes it sound like it's something she knows for sure. "Everything is okay."

-

 **3: 06 pm**

  
Cass finds them sitting on top of a climbing frame. They're in an elementary school's playground, in one of the seedier bits of Gotham.

"Not angry?" she asks Tim, staying a little way back.

He shakes his head. "No, I'm not angry. I'm -" he pauses, and looks at them both. His mouth twists into a wry grin. "Homesick."

It's strange for them to be here like this, Steph thinks as Cass climbs up to sit with them. All in ordinary clothes, on a windy and overcast day in the suburbs. Like they're normal kids or something.

"All children leave," Cass says quietly. "Grow up."

Tim shakes his head again. "I'm not running away from home. My father would kill Bruce." He tilts his face up and closes his eyes. "And I don't mean that metaphorically."

"No. When you're older. You can choose."

"It won't be the same. Anyway, I never thought I'd be doing this when I was an adult."

Steph sighs. "That's because you're so good at lying that you do it to yourself, boyfriend wonder."

-

 **4:26 pm**

The clouds have cleared a little. Some kids are playing on the swingset, and the squeaking creak of the chains makes it easier to stay quiet.

"She's a better kisser than Superboy," Cass says to Tim. Steph spends a second seriously considering what the quickest way to make herself unconscious would be.

Then Tim tilts his head, thoughtful, and says "You think so?"

Steph wonders if there are specially trained counselors for the hero community. "Just how many people have you been kissing and crushing on while we've been dating, Tim?"

"I don't know, Steph. How many people have you had pollen sex with?" His mouth's a thin line, but his eyes are smiling.

Cass looks entertained and slightly puzzled, like how Steph feels when her Mom watches French comedies. "You two are... strange."

-

 **5:40 pm**

"I should go. Otherwise, he'll think I'm doing things on the forbidden list." Tim swings down off the climbing frame.

"Things will be okay," Steph says again, and wonders how many times she has to say it before it starts being true.

Tim smiles. Steph hasn't seen such a dishonest expression aimed at her from him since before they were a couple.

"We should go, too," Cass reminds Steph quietly.

"See? Places to go, villains to punch. I'll see you 'round, guys." Tim turns to go.

"Wait, Tim..." Steph jumps down.

"Yeah?"

"Everything changes, y'know? Even this will, sooner or later."

He smiles at her like she's something that's right with the world. Gives her a soft, light kiss.

"Of course it will," he says, but she doesn't think he believes it.

-

 **6:30 pm**

"You didn't buy _me_ flowers," Cass says to Steph as they stock their belts. The pot plant with the card from 'Selina' is gone from the table, probably to a sunnier position upstairs somewhere.

"You think you'd take good care of a plant, B.G? I'll buy you a cactus, if you like, but that's it."

"How romantic." Cass clips her belt on.

"That's me." Steph double-checks the Kryptonite pouch. "Ready to roll?"

"You bet."

-

 **7:04 pm**

Steph loves the Batmobile. She feels like a rockstar and a superhero all in one when she and Batman ride in it.

"Is it true about the turnips?"

"Yes."

"And about Superman?"

Batman's mouth twitches, like he's Really Absolutely Not Smiling. It reminds Steph of Tim.

"Yes."

"All things considered, this job should come with a warning label. 'Caution: contains weirdness'."

"Perhaps you're right."

"Of course I am." She settles back in her seat. "Oh, can I ask for a favor? If we get whammied by Ivy again, can you sternly tell me to go home in the general direction of Tim's house?"

Batman clears his throat. "Are you sure that's wise, Robin?"

"Nah. But I think he'd appreciate the gesture. And you know he'll just knock me out and tie me up, anyway. Not even in the fun way."

"All things considered, I think _you_ should come with a warning label."

"Guess that makes me the right woman for the job, then."

"Yes," Batman says.


End file.
